The week that went by, was one of my driest, creatively speaking. I ran out of ideas to think of, or write about. As if that wasn’t enough, I also experienced boredom, and I mean real, serious boredom that made me question everything that could have contributed to this.
Well, things happen. One doesn’t always understand why. But, they do.
Dealing With Boredom and Melancholy
Being bored is something that you hear kids complain of, all the time, but, since I’m not someone who’s given to such things, it threw me completely at my wits end! I mean, I’ve not gone through anything like this in recent times. Naturally, I didn’t know what to make of it.
It was as if nothing would engage my mind—I tried working out, reading, walking and listening to music, but to no avail. The cool morning air on my skin did nothing to me and I remained oblivious to the glorious azure skyline as well.
But, I did ponder at length upon my daily grind and the lack of excitement and enthusiasm in the everything that was lined up in the coming week, which meant there was possibly nothing to look forward to in the days ahead.
That Sinking Feeling
I found myself slipping all too easily into a feeling that could best be described as a mix of melancholy and irritability which, can be a very potent combination when you’re already feeling depleted mentally and physically.
I failed to fathom what was amiss. I couldn’t bring myself to write on the blog either.
Pulling Up By The Bootstraps
On a sudden impulse, I pulled out my diary and scribbled a few essential things on my ‘to-do’ list, that were meant to be ticked off before the end of this week. Thereafter, I headed to the kitchen to cook dinner. Perhaps, getting busy would help me rid myself of that terrible feeling of incompetence that was sweeping over me now.
When it was finally time to call it a day, I concluded it was clearly not my day at all!
I don’t know when I drifted off when I hit the bed but when the alarm went off at 5 am the next morning, something had clearly shifted in my consciousness. The weight under which I was crushing all of Sunday, had partially lifted. I felt relieved and deeply thankful to the Universe for bringing me back to myself again.
Isn’t it strange how some days make us drown in melancholy and despair and we seem to find a million reasons that make us feel like an utter failure, but then, funnily enough, those are also the days that make us realise the true worth of our happy days, no matter how few and far between they happen to be.
Counting the Blessings
I realised what a blessing it is to be alive and see a new dawn each morning. But, then, that’s a blessing only when we realise it to be a blessing. When we are drowning in overwhelm and sadness though, it’s a completely different matter.
Thank God for small mercies! I think one of the things I learnt this week was how even a tiny shift in our perspective can make such a HUGE difference in the way we feel and respond to the world around us. Even a minute change in the way we feel can be so deeply impactful! Aren’t we glad that our bad days don’t last long enough to kill our spirit? I bet we do.
With a new week comes endless new possibilities. Today, this thought alone is enough to perk me up. If it has to be one step at a time, then so be it. I’m fine with that too.
Meanwhile, if you’re wondering why you’ve not seen me share your posts on Twitter over the past few months, let me tell you after my account was hacked in February, and I reported the same to Twitter, they not only suspended my account without any intimation, but also barred me from creating a new account, despite multiple attempts from my end. It is because of this reason alone that I’ve not been able to share any blogposts in the past couple of months.
The good news is, that today, the Universe was on my side. 🙂 Yes, I finally managed to create my new Twitter account. Request you to kindly follow me there, if you aren’t already. (Here’s the link: https://twitter.com/EshaMookerjee). Thank you in advance. I’m hoping I’ll be able to not only read and comment but also share blogposts from all of you, once again.
Now, that I’ve shared all about my week gone by, tell me, how did the past week go for you? What’s the one thing you’re looking forward to this week?
I’m so glad to have read this post. It’s nice to know we aren’t alone with all these complex feelings 🙂
…boredom can be a problem for me!
I’ve always seen boredom as a precursor to more creativity. To me, it indicates a desire to get more creativity!
I hear you, Esha. The two days leading to my birthday were the exact same. I had a meltdown, and just couldn’t gather myself together. I was better on my birthday, thankfully. I blame it all on my hormones that are doing some crazy business of pushing me off the edge every now and then.
I hope you don’t feel the same way again. And, if you do, you know what to do!