A Leaf From a Writer’s Diary

 

Words elude me and yet, I write!

Every morning, I settle down with a cup of tea and my journal, to partake in the process of thought dumping. I love the clarity I get when I am done with clearing my head, laying off things that have been piling up slowly over time. It is a much-needed thing to do when your head is bustling with a lot of thoughts that demand your time and attention on a constant basis.

Thought dumping is therapeutic. It’s like watching someone take out the trash and bring in a clean basket to give you a fresh start for another day. You know the trash will pile up all over again, but at least, you’re not carrying the load from the previous weeks inside, anymore.

That brings me to how Ideas are usually abundant in the mornings. And they come to us only when we are clear in the head, once all our unwanted thoughts are dumped. If we don’t capture these amazing ideas early enough, they run away, and most often, as is the case, they find another home elsewhere, as Liz Gilbert says. I do believe that actually happens.

My mornings are always busy, and the days when I’m very lucky, I get to read something, which hasn’t been happening for a while now. I often dream of having an entire morning to myself to read and write—wishful thinking, I know, but you know, it’s the thought—the fact that it will happen someday propels me forward and brings me this hope that no matter how impossible it might seem right now, it will actually happen and maybe sometime soon.

As I straddle between multiple roles, and the demands of everyday life, the writer in me keeps waiting patiently, for one opportunity to come up—not one to give up— I remain, in waiting, for any chance, however little, to pick up the pen or type away on the laptop.

One step is all it takes to get the ball rolling. One word is how one gets started. One word of encouragement helps ease the mind when the words refuse to flow. Word upon word…that’s all we need to banish the fear when we are stuck. Writing is never easy. That doesn’t mean we should give up.

Words evade me, and yet, I write. Thanks to my angels—you are the wind beneath my wings who nudge me to write every week.

You know who you are—and yes, this week’s post is dedicated to you! <3

 

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Written as part of our #SoulfulSunday freewriting exercise—along with VinithaShilpa and Anamika.

10 thoughts

  1. It’s funny; I’m not an Elizabeth Gilbert fan, but have found myself relating to her quotations twice in two hours. 😉 I agree, uncaptured thoughts run away and find homes where they are more appreciated. Or at least noticed enough to be noted.

  2. I can see wings growing out of my body and the white angelic halo effect surrounding me. I will not go into the details because then ‘ye duniyawale poochenge mulakaat hui kya baat hui…’ 😀 😀
    Mornings are the right time to think, read and write while rest of the house sleeps. The pandemic will end one day for sure, the troubles of life will get easy and then you (and I) will get to claim your calm to be who you are and to do what you love to do. The struggle to write due to the words evading will cease and you will be writing the best pieces you have ever written.
    The angels will come to bless you again this week so don’t worry 🙂

  3. Yes, the mornings are such a great time to catch up with ourselves and write! And yes, a commitment to writing regularly and having friends to nudge us along keep us going.

  4. Writing in the morning quietness is so beautifully, so peaceful, so worth waking up before the house does! But it isn’t always possible despite the allure, I know. But look at you, making the most out of the time you are getting to write! Reading your posts are nothing short of enjoying a peaceful morning quiet, Esha. And, only you can produce such heavenly content. Your words would give even the mundane activities a dreamy sort of angle. That’s an amazing gift, Esha. I am not trying to flatter you or praise you because you are my friend. From the first time I read your post, that was the impression I had.
    I wish you a lot more time to write your stories. And of course, nobody is giving you permission to go anywhere before you tell all the stories locked in your head and heart.

  5. Ah! The few mornings that I get to myself are like precious jewels. Sometimes I wish I could make time slow down, so they could last a little bit longer! Keep writing, Esha. You have a gift with words. <3

  6. And, I am glad you write, despite everything!
    Just look at your post, Esha. You say that words evade you, and yet you write an entire post with the most exquisite words chosen to create a sentence that expresses your feelings so beautifully! I know how tough it is for you to find the time to write, and yet, every time you write, you make it seem so easy! It seems to the reader that writing, for you, is akin to breathing. You just do it! So easily, like it’s second nature! Bravo, my girl!

    1. Thank you, thank you, thank you dear Shilpa! I just hope that the stories I have to share with the world find their way out before my time is up. Time is tight and life is tough and demanding. Squeezing little time-boxed opportunities through these is a challenge but I can only do it because I know I have some very kind friends who encourage me to go on.
      You girls are an amazing lot and you know that, don’t you? <3 <3 <3

  7. Absolutely true Esha. The ideas gets lost like the flutter of windy chimes if we don’t tap into them. Your writing always offer this breezy feeling and yes, I am a strong believer in angel. Have an awesome day.

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